Glasses Fashion

I have a genuine inquiry for those of you who wear glasses. Recently I had my annual eye exam and my prescription changed, so that meant I should order new glasses. Yesterday my new frames and my new prescription sunglasses arrived and it got me thinking. When you choose your new glasses, do you feel like changing it up everytime, or do you always go for the same frames?

I have been changing the style for the last few times. Started with some pure black frames, that changed to black with white arms, and then a dark green set, changed to a pair with various shades of red. Most recent frames are an eggplant purple frame that look more red toned in the sunshine. I have mostly gone into frames shopping with the idea that if I have to wear them every day, then I want something that is fun. To me color is how you avoid making things boring.

Another thought on my mind is the idea that some people choose frames with the intention of trying to maintain their overall style. If they mainly wear dark colors then black frames are probably a good choice, since it goes with everything in their wardrobe. Some people will go for their favorite color. Mine is yellow, so that would certainly make for some interesting set of glasses.

So I am genuinely curious, what do you think about when you are choosing a new pair of glasses? Please let me know in the comments below. I would really appreciate some more interaction with these posts.

Fun Filled Weekends

This weekend I have been getting out of the house and having fun with my friends. Yesterday B. and I went out for lunch and then to a garden center that was hosting a thrift sale for the local humane society. I obviously wanted to go and support them, they have given me five incredible animals the past few years, and I am glad I have the means to give them a little help. Today, A. and the kids are picking me up and we are heading to Action City for a morning filled with games, laughter, and memories in the making.

Some weekends I am not up for having big plans. The week was hard enough and I need the weekend to recuperate my energy levels for the following week. This week though, I am very grateful for friends who make plans. I have been enjoying getting out with them lately and I hope my body cooperates, and lets me continue to have lots of fun. (One of the draw backs of having chronic illness.)

My friends have always been a bright light in my life. They get me and are very understanding. B. A. and L. are my three best friends. Sadly L. lives across the country or I am sure we would be hanging out much more. I am also grateful to have lived in the time of easy communication. I am able to reach out to all three with a quick text whenever I need or want to. That text can sit there, in their inbox, as long as it needs to, and they can answer when the get a moment. Two of them are professionals with busy jobs, and the third is an incredibly devoted mom who is always busy as well. So I am glad whenever they get the chance to message me back.

This weekend is the first in a long time, where I get to see more than one friend, in just those two days. My social battery is being given a workout, but I couldn’t be more thankful to have the time with them. Like I mentioned earlier, it is weekends like these that are memories in the making, and I know I will look back at them and smile.

Fun filled weekends are few and far between these days, especially as adults with responsibilities. So when you get the opportunity to spend a little extra time with someone you love and cherish, don’t let it slip away. Let yourself have those fun packed days every once in a while.

A Day For All Kinds Of Love

As we approach the Hallmark created holiday of Valentine’s Day, I have been thinking. I am single again this year, like always, so I may not have a romantic valentine, but that doesn’t mean I don’t have lots of love to celebrate. In my opinion Valentine’s Day has always been about showing those we love how much we care for them, and we have just lost sight and narrowed that view point down to just romantic love.

Growing up, my parents always gave each of us kids something on Valentine’s Day. Some of my favorites are my teddy bear that says you are my sunshine on it. My mom calls me Sunshine because she used to sing the song to me when I was little. I have always loved the song, so the nickname stuck. My mom and dad reminded us every year that love doesn’t just mean romantic partners. Love is a connection between people that truly care for each other.

Ever since one of my best friends has had her kids, I have started giving them valentines as well. This year I gave them little stuffed animals. A got a kitty, due to her love for them, and W got a dino that he has dubbed Sparkles due to the gold spikes on the back. I have gotten lots of pictures ever since I dropped the stuffies off with the kids, of them hugging them and playing. W has become pretty attached to his dino, and I am pretty thrilled that I could provide him with something he holds so dear.

When I gave the stuffies to the kids, I reminded them that Valentine’s Day is meant to celebrate all kinds of love. Family love, sibling love, friendship love, as well as romantic love, to name a few. As we approach and begin to celebrate the day of love, it is not only important to remind ourselves that it is about all kinds of love, but we should also show those we care about how much they matter to us more than just once a year.

Here’s to showing those we love how much they mean to us.

Plant Babies

I am pretty proud to say that I have managed to keep a pineapple plant alive for ten whole months! Obviously I am the type of person that has to name her plants, so I have named her Penelope. I also have a snake plant named Genevieve. The snake plant came with a paper steak stuck in the pot that made it sound like she had already been named, so I just went with it. Penny and Gen have two very different set of needs, but they both live in my bedroom. I have had to create some contrast to try and give them both what they need to thrive.

Penny sits on top of a white cube cabinet near one of the windows. I have placed bamboo skewers around the main body of the plant, with cotton yarn to provide extra structure. Pineapples can be heavy fruit, so the skewers have helped the entire plant stand up straight. I also have a grow light shining on her. Since they are used to tropical environments, pineapples require quite a bit of sunshine. I live in Wisconsin, where it is currently cold and dreary looking outside. So the grow light helps me provide the much needed vitamin D that helps Penny stay strong.

Gen lives across the room, on top of a much shorter bookshelf. Snake plants prefer indirect sunlight. By being across the room from the two windows in my bedroom, Gen will not be scorched by any harsh rays that may manage to sneak in my windows. I personally think she likes the placement because the leaves are growing taller.

Due to a certain predator that lives in my room as well, AKA Erza the cat, I have chosen the spots for my plants to live very carefully. They are on top of furniture that Erza can’t access. She is very curious about the plants, obviously, but I have done my best to make sure that she knows that they are not chew toys, or something to be attacked. Thankfully, she has gotten the message and the plants don’t have to fear the micro panther. (Knock on wood!)

I have taken steps to try and track when I water the plants as well. A calendar on the wall features little water droplets that I have drawn on with blue marker, on the days that I have given them water. I don’t want to drown them, so I try and remember to check the soil beforehand, to see if they actually need it.

I get emotionally attached to these plants. I get excited when I see signs that they are healthy and growing. When one of them dies, I get sad for a little while. This attachment might be aided by the fact that I have taken to putting large googly eyes on the pot of the plant. That started mostly because it amuses me. It turned into something silly that made me smile for a moment when I saw it, and there needs to be more things like that in the world. Personally, I will always take pride in my plant babies and how well they are doing. I will enjoy them while they are around and do my best to take care of them.

Ultimately they bring me joy, and I find worth in the simple things that manage to accomplish making me smile. I hope you can find a small thing that makes you smile today.

A Rose By Any Other Name

Growing up with a unique name was certainly an adventure. It used to annoy me when people would mispronounce or misspell my name. My name is spelt phonetically, and because of that fact, I didn’t understand why so many people have such an issue with pronouncing or spelling my name. Now I realize that because people are not used to my name, they over think it and that is why they have such an issue. While I now understand why people struggle with my name, it still boggles my mind when people look at my name and call me names like Kassidy. There is no A or D in my name, so why try and add letters?

The story behind my name is that my Mom was college roommates with a wonderful woman named Kesinee. My Mom fell in love with the name, and when she had me, her first daughter, she gave me the name. The original Kesinee is now my God Mother as well.

I always get a good giggle out of visiting my God Mother at her day care that she runs out of her home. When I introduce myself to the kids, they always laugh and say that I can’t be named Kesinee. I have to get my God Mother to confirm for them that I share her name. It probably is because they are either not used to two people with the same name, or they are really not used to two people sharing such a unique name.

In school, I could always tell when the teacher would get to my name on the roster or during roll call. Because it was alphabetical by last name, I was always at the end of the list. There would be a giant pause, and the teacher would usually make some sort of face that showed how unsure they were about the pronunciation of the name they were reading. Most would try and take a stab at it, and the majority who tried would get close. A few would read off my last name and ask me how to say my first name. One that made me smile was when they said that they were not going to even attempt to say my name because they knew they would get it wrong and just said my last name. At least they tried?

While I may complain about my name because of the issues so many have with the pronunciation and spelling, I would never change it. I never had to deal with multiple people in my classroom with the same name, or with getting confused when someone would call out my name. I always knew that they meant to be talking to me. (Obviously this changes slightly when I am around my God Mother.)

My name is special to me. I will always be thankful that I was blessed with a unique name. But if I had a nickel for every time someone mispronounced or misspelled my name, I would have been able to pay for college.

Comfort Shows

Growing up I would watch certain tv shows whenever I caught them playing on the regular channels. Reruns were something I hunted for. Shows like The Last Airbender and Charmed were something I would seek out when I was home sick or needed something familiar playing in the background while I was working on something else.

Before streaming came along, my mom got me and my sister DVD sets of the first three seasons of Charmed. We would watch them over and over. I would imagine I was a powerful witch with magical powers. I could escape into the world created in the show. Because I had watched each episode so many times, I knew exactly what would happen and didn’t find the need to focus on the tv and I could work on a project, or homework without missing important events in the story of the show.

Since streaming, I have kept track of which service has had the original Charmed series available. (Which by the way is Peacock) Periodically, I would come back to it and rewatch the majority of the series. With the power of being able to pick and choose, I often would skip over episodes that I wasn’t a fan of.

Something that I have treasured and found comfort in since I was a child continues to bring me a joy. I want to hold on to things that connect me to the person I once was. Maybe if I hold on to some of those core loves, those core values, then I won’t change so much that I can’t recognize who I am. I am keeping things with me to hold close. I am keeping my comfort shows.

A Reciprocal Connection

I have been thinking lately about how my family’s animals picked us just as much as we picked them. I have written in a previous post about Erza picking me, but the other animals in my life followed that same pattern pretty closely.

Maggie was still needing to be with her mom when I first got to meet her. My parents took my sister and I to meet her when she was around six weeks old. We were supposed to have gotten a puppy from a previous litter, but the mother had sadly miscarried. Maggie was a part of the next litter to be born, so we had first pick.

When we went to meet Maggie, we sat down in the puppy play pen, and were obviously surrounded by Maggie and her litter mates. Every time one of her siblings tried to get our attention, if Maggie wasn’t being held by one of us, she would push them out of the way. “This is my family, so back off,” was probably what she was thinking. She wanted to love all of us, and not share.

River was a rescue puppy. I saw a listing on the local humane society’s Facebook page about a litter of puppies, and River wasn’t even one of those listed. Another family had already shown interest. Fortunately for us, that family changed their minds, and we ended up with him.

Originally his name was Galileo. What a mouthful of a name, especially for a puppy. So when we got him home, we decided to change his name. My sister offered up the name River because of the strip of white fur on his nose, it looks like a river.

These connections were meant to be if you ask me. I think that we receive the pet we need when the time is right. They choose to love us just as much as we choose them.

Connections Spanning Species

Lately I have been thinking about how animals pick their person. (As I type this Erza is making herself comfy laying against my side, even across my right arm a bit.)

Erza picked me as her person, her favorite. I am very honored that she chose me and that feeling has never wavered. The moment I met her and picked her up for the first time, at five months old, she instantly started purring and didn’t want to be put down. She knew something then. She must have had a feeling about me and knew that I would take care of her. I could be trusted to look after her and give her the life she deserves.

Last night I made the joke that I didn’t think Erza would be my cat if I wasn’t the one who fed her every meal. My mom rolled her eyes at this notion and pointed out several signs that I failed to see, signs that Erza really thinks of me as her person.

Every time I close my bedroom door, I have to be prepared for the possibility of Erza pawing/clawing at the other side of the door trying to get in and be with me. She is one smart cat. (My parents have taken to referring to her as the Mensa cat.) Over time she has watched and learned that the shiny thing attached to the wood, if turned, opened the door and allowed access to the other side. So Erza has taken to reaching up to her full height and putting one paw on either side of the door knob and trying her hardest to turn it herself. I am convinced that if I had a lever handle on my door, she would be constantly opening it.

Another sign that my Mom pointed out, was that Erza likes to take naps with me. If I fall asleep during the day and don’t want a furry heater with me, I have to kick her out of my room and close the door. Otherwise Erza will curl up between my legs and fall asleep with me. She softly purrs while falling asleep. If I shift in my sleep, I have woken to find her position moved as well, just enough so that she is still touching some part of me in her sleep, like it comforts her. (She has currently progressed to sleeping, and purring, while laying on my arm. Thankfully I have use of my hand still. :D)

I think my favorite connection sign though has to be when she plays with me. Her top two toys and springs and those craft pom poms. Again, because she is so smart, she learned that if she brings me the toy, I will throw it for her and we can play together. I melt when she brings me one of her toys and places it beside me. Then she will wait for me to throw it for her and chances are pretty high she will start to play fetch with me. She has only ever really played like this with me.

Last but not least, is that she gives me high fives on command. I wanted to try out the idea that cats can learn tricks like dogs, so I got a clicker and started working with Erza. I taught her the command “Give me paw” and she will tap my hand with her paw when asked, especially if there are treats involved. I am the only one she will give high fives to. Several other have tried the command, at my request because I wanted to show off, and she refused until I asked.

Love is a connection between two souls. Erza is a light to me on some of my harder days. I will forever be honored to be the one she picked to be her person. If you own a pet, or have spent enough time with animals, you know they pick you just as much as you pick them.

Childhood Values

I was hanging out with one of my best friends the other day and we were watching her eldest child running through the sprinkler and playing in his little pool. The warm weather made it the perfect day to give him the little squirt guns that I had found recently. I became the cool adult because I engaged in a water fight with him. My shirt was soaked and my glasses speckled with droplets by the time he moved on to running through the sprinkler as it watered the grass.

These events got me thinking about my childhood and how we would entertain ourselves while on summer break. I am a 90s baby, so things like smart phones and iPads didn’t exist yet. Warm summer days were spent playing outside with the neighborhood kids, or on play dates with friends from school. Sprinklers and little kiddie pools were special treats used to try and beat the heat. If you happened to live in an area with street lights, as soon as they turned on, you were expected to be heading home for the night.

Looking back on these memories, I started thinking about how I wanted to approach raising my possible future children. I don’t want them to become attached to screens. Occasional time spent watching tv or playing on a smart device will be allowed. I treasured watching Saturday morning cartoons with my dad, while still in our pjs, eating a bowl of cereal. Also long car rides might be made a bit easier on my sanity if screen time was given.

Overall though, I think I would like them to have a childhood similar to mine. Playing outside and exploring the world while curiosity still runs deep in their bones. Learning about how the natural world works by getting their hands in the dirt. Using their imagination to create fantastical worlds that entertain the mind for hours. Making use of the warmer weather in the summer to get some vitamin D and learning to swim.

A child shouldn’t become jaded by the world until they are old enough to understand how we got to where we are, in my opinion. I want to try my best to preserve the innocent nature that they start with, for as long as I can. Fingers crossed that I can actually achieve this ideal.

The Family Pet

I always was surrounded by animals growing up. Several dogs at once, and a few cats that would lounge around the house like royalty. My current lot is three dogs, (River, Cooper, and Maggie), and three cats (Erza, Pho, and Gobi). Something I have learned being with these animals through my life, is there is a very deep connection that forms between an owner and the pet. Even if the animal did not choose you as their human, you become attached to the creature, and your memories have this happy glow to them.

My pets have always been furry, and that would be because I am not a huge fan of the other varieties. I am glad that other people find space in their hearts for these animals, because I certainly wouldn’t be able to properly take care of them due to my aversion. If you own a creature of the scaly persuasion, then I am truly happy for you. Those animals deserve to have the best life that can be given to them.

Cats in particular seem to really enjoy being around me. Since I was ten years old I have been a proud cat mom. Now for those who are against using the parent terms with our fur babies, please note that I have thought it through and found it appropriate. You take care of every need these animals have. You buy them toys and food, take them to the doctor when they are under the weather. There is a responsibility that you take on when you adopt an animal. I don’t have kids, so I can’t compare completely, but too many people their pets are their babies.

As a cat mom, I have had a partner in crime, a best friend, and a furry soulmate all wrapped into one. Smokey was my first cat. My dad brought home two kittens when I was ten years old. They had been barn cats and he only meant to adopt one, but couldn’t separate them because they were playing together and having the best time. So Smokey and her brother Riley became part of our family. Riley chose my younger sister as his person, and he completely understood what she needed out of that relationship. Smokey chose me and I was completely honored to be her person.

It wasn’t very obvious at first, but turned out that Smokey was born blind. There was no physical problem with her eyes, which we a crystal blue that I just adored, so we assumed that the connection along her optic nerve or in her brain wasn’t quite working. This fact never changed anything for me and our relationship though. Even though she couldn’t see like an average cat, she never knew what she was missing. I would pick out toys that made noise, or had reflective surfaces because it seemed like she could pick out some lights and shadows. Smell was a big thing for her, and it seemed to drive how she found her way around the world.

At age 24, I unfortunately lost her due to the original brain condition that she was born with. The vet told me to be very proud of how long she had lived because most cats with brain issues don’t live to be 14. Two weeks later, I adopted Erza. Some may say that is too fast to adopt another, but I had all this love to give and without my cat to give it to, I was lost. Erza helped heal me. She gave me plenty of reasons to smile again and to feel safe loving another cat like I had with Smokey.

Each animal has their own personality. Smokey was fairly calm, and took her time figuring out her next move. Erza loves to play with my pens, and throws her whole self into every adventure she possibly can have. (Obviously this will sometimes get her into trouble.) These differences made me feel my grief in the beginning, when I so desperately wanted Smokey back. However as time has gone by, I realized that I love that Erza is not a carbon copy of my first kitty. I enjoy watching her eyes and how they explore her surroundings, mostly because Smokey’s eyes never reacted to her world. Erza chases after toys that I throw, and I really enjoy that I am finding a new way to interact with my cat.

Our pets have love to give, and I am completely certain that they understand us in their own way. They come give us cuddles when we are sad. They know when to back off and give us a moment to ourselves. Specific words make more sense to them, like your word for their favorite toys, or what you call their meals/food. Overall though, I know that Erza understands me when I explain something to her, and the other animals in my house show the same intelligence spark in their eyes. (Don’t get me wrong there are some animals that are not the brightest crayon in the box, but the same goes for people.)

That bond that forms between us and our pets is incredibly strong and I know that I never want to go for very long in my life without having some form of it. To know the love of an animal, is to know truly unconditional love. They don’t know the concept of hate, or prejudice. It certainly makes me laugh when I see them thinking that a stranger is just a friend they haven’t met yet. They never dislike someone without getting to know who they really are.

I will forever be thankful for the time I got with Smokey, and all my other pets who have passed on. I am also so grateful for the bonds that I have now. The possibility of even more bonds out there that I have yet to make excites me. Hopefully some of you readers feel the same way.

Distractions Please

This week I have been trying my best to keep myself distracted. Having to sit with just my thoughts would not have been too fun for the past few days. The right side of my jaw has been in quite a bit of pain and I have been doing quite a few things to not focus on it. (I have been to the dentist and I am working on getting better.) One thing that has managed to even make me laugh was a conversation that I had with my family last night. I asked a simple thought question: Do Transformers need to buy car insurance or life insurance?

My sister answered first, “They need both.”

Mom then turned to her and asked, “But then which one pays out if something happens to them?”

This started a whole string of questions and laughter. Sister thinks that the payout depends on which mode they are in when they are “injured”, car mode or robot mode. I tend to agree with her. Many other trains of thought stemmed from this overall idea. Who would get the ticket if the Transformer is in an accident? Normally it is the driver but if the car is self driving, as is the case with robot cars, does the car itself have to pay? (On a side note, do Transformers even have money? Who pays for the parts they use to repair themselves?)

Then the idea of playing chicken came up. For those who are not aware, playing chicken in cars is where you drive directly at the other person while they drive at you. Whoever swerves to the side first loses and is deemed the chicken. When it comes to Transformers playing chicken, if neither of them swerve to avoid a head on collision, and the damage is bad enough, is that considered murder? (Kind of a dark thought sorry.) Now another thought to consider, are the Transformers ever really dead? To the best of my knowledge, the majority of engines in modern times are able to be rebuilt with spare parts. And even if the full engine needs to be replaced, would that be like a heart transplant? I am guessing an argument could be made that the body of the car, as long as it can still be morphed into the robot form, is what makes a Transformer.

We had a lot of fun just asking questions and throwing out answers on this strange topic. That is just how conversation evolves when three out of the four participants have ADHD.

Birthdays: Celebrating Another Year!

Well, I have made another trip around the sun. I am another year older. Maybe a little bit wiser too? I have always enjoyed the extra love I receive on my birthday. Getting woken up by my parents before they leave for work, so they can be the first ones to wish me a very Happy Birthday and give me my present. This year it was two new sets of very soft pajamas that I was in desperate need of. As I have gotten older I have come to value more the presents that are things that I need and will actually use, than the silly luxury gifts. Things like new pjs and bookmarks from my one of my favorite fandoms, show that the person was really listening to me and knows details about me that shows they care.

I also love gifts of new things I haven’t had the chance to try, especially art things. My friend B. sends me a gift every year and usually it is some art tool I haven’t been brave enough to spend my own money on because I am afraid that I won’t get my moneys worth out of it. I have gotten to try out so many new things just because she is my friend and she listens when I offer up ideas that I would like to try.

Gifts also have a challenge for the Birthday Person, at least I personally have one. I don’t want to ask for too much from my friends and family. Money is a very real worry for me, and I know the feeling of not being able to afford that one thing that my loved one asked for. So to combat this worry a bit, I try and aim for a decent sized list of things that are around $20. Twenty bucks, to me, seems like a nice amount that you can still afford it but it is a quality gift. My friend A. loves when I go to the Dollar Tree to get her gift. The same amount of money gets quite a few little things that she will find useful and like a treat to herself. Like candy that she doesn’t have to share with her son or husband.

Speaking of A., she is what has become known as my Birthday Buddy. Her birthday is the day before mine, so we have taken to picking a day during the week and exchanging gifts between us. During high school, because her birthday means she is just over 24 hours older than me, it was fun to have someone to go through the milestone ages with. Our senior year, our 18th birthdays landed on a weekend, and my family took me out to dinner to celebrate along with a few of my friends. I hesitated planning the dinner for Saturday because that fell on A.’s birthday and I didn’t want to intrude on her day. Thankfully she is an incredible person and she understood when I asked. She attended the dinner and we sang her happy birthday as well.

Looking back on my birthdays, I have always felt loved and celebrated. No matter how small the present, my loved ones have more than made up for it with time. Time spent cooking my favorite meal for a birthday dinner. Time spent picking up a cheese cake from the bakery. (I much prefer cheese cake over regular cake.) Time spent making my heart melt with mushy notes written on cards. Many of which I keep in a treasure box in my bedroom. But most of all, time spent making me laugh and smile.

I am so grateful for my incredible friends and amazing family. They make each trip around the sun that much better.

Thoughtful Questions

Occasionally I need to entertain myself when I don’t have my usual methods around. When the need arises, I find myself turning to what I have begun to call “Thought Questions”. These questions are usually prefaced by giving a scenario that is different from the world we know every day. My dad is often the source of these questions as well.

An example that my dad asked first and that I have asked many people in my life because I find it silly: If fish had fur instead of scales, how would they take care of their fur? Since the idea is all hypothetical, any answer can be valid.

A few answers that I have received are:

• They would go to a beauty shop run by the Octopi.

• They would have to convince land dwelling animals to assist them in procuring hair care products such as combs and brushes. This would also require the fish to assist each other due to the small size of many species’ fins.

• They would use coral or other surrounding vegetation to serve as a comb.

• They would have multiple fur dreads or mats.

Another thought question that has amused me quite often is: If you were to steal something from another person’s house, but only mildly upset the person by doing so, not actually hurt them, what would you take? Several of the answers that I have heard have made me laugh.

• The plate out of the microwave

• Their left shoes/half of each pair of socks

• The backs to their remotes/the batteries out of them

• The shoelaces out of all the shoes

• Their forks/spoons

These are just a few of the questions that I have entertained myself with. Surely there are plenty more out there and I would love to hear them. Maybe it is my ADHD, but I really enjoy hearing how other people think things through and I feel like you can learn something about the person based on the answer they provide, or even if they refuse to play along.

I have found that the majority of people that I surround myself with will play along with me, and I think that is a good sign for the type of people in my life. They are willing to be silly and play a small game. What I really love is when they get passionate about their answer and discussing other people’s answers with each other.

Overall I think thought questions are a great way to learn about others, and entertain not only yourself when your options are limited.